Pastime
After a slight,well meaning detour last week,The Krude
Experience is back on track with the bumwinebob.com express.
Now back to your regularly scheduled Krudeness.
Unless you can find a pro beach volleyball program hosted by
Karch Kiraly,what else do you watch on tv on a steamy Sunday afternoon during the
summer? The 700 Club? Major World used car infomercial? Full House rerun?
Wrong. Wrong. And wrong.
Real men watch baseball. MLB beisbol. Preferably,with a
plate of chow and a cold beverage close by. And your better half (broad) out
shopping. Ah yes. Life is grand. HD grand.
But what happens when your chick wants to go out with you on
a Sunday and you want to watch the game? Just cough up the dough and take her
to the ballpark. She can get some sun,have a few drinks,and spend time with her
man. Chicks like sitting in public next to the cock they plan on riding later.
Why not make it at the stadium?
Pricey beers at the stadium can be a concern (on the wallet
and psyche).Knowing stadium booze prices are high mainly because of asshole
ARod size salaries of a lot of players. With some players taking in close to a
$1mil a week,you will only see stadium booze prices go up. Bummer.
I went to the 1978 World Series as a kid. The ticket cost
$17,for the best seat in the house. A handful of nachos and a warm,flat Lite
beer will now set you back $18. Double bummer.
Since I brought up the 1970's... Here's a long story made
very short. My parents went a NY Yankees banquet honoring Joe Dimaggio in the
late 70's. Billy Martin and Mickey Mantle (best buds) were there. They managed
to make enough drunken, lewd comments in front of my mother that she made my
father leave the banquet early.She is still insulted about that incident to
this day. I think my father is more pissed for not staying and mingling with
the legends.
Fact: Babe Ruth never did steroids. Just booze,whores,hot
dogs and cigars. My kind of guy.
Fact: Jose Canseco is a low rent buffoon,but he is not a
liar.Vindicated.
I like pitchers who doctor the ball.Then act like they're
innocent when the umpires catch them red handed. Thank you Gaylord Perry.
Baseball is always at its best when a flashy ring is at
stake. Championship rings should be mandatory pinky rings for men. And made of
cheap gold plating and cubic zirconia. So that if the player gets divorced,his
ex won't want his cheap ass (yet cool) ring in the settlement. Smart thinking.
There was nothing like watching the late Ralph Kiner shill
for Schaefer beer during NY Mets broadcasts. He always looked way more than
half in the bag during Kiners Korner segments.A drunkard's drunkard indeed. If
he was still alive,I'm sure he'd do BWB's podcast. And still be a shill for
Schaefer beer.
Baseball is more about legs,than arms. If you ever played
baseball,you'll agree.
Pastime is the title of a great baseball movie starring
Glenn Plummer and William Russ. Perfect flick for when a game gets rained out. Or
if you need to kill a couple of hours and Pornhub hasn't refreshed their inventory.
Barry Bonds was a surefire Hall Of Famer before 1998. Pete
Rose always played and coached to win. Roger Clemens was the Nolan Ryan of his
generation. They all belong in the MLB HOF. Now.
Always take the first pitch
Then swing for the fences
And touch all the bases
KK
@kapn_krude
Tags:
krude experience