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Monday, June 20, 2016

The Krude Experience - 6/20/16


Soccer 

Let's get something straight right off the bat. Soccer is named Football everywhere except the USA and Canada. Aptly name sport.Yet it was the English that coined the name Soccer before us Yanks and Canucks exploited that name. Blimey.  

Soccer should just be universally renamed Good Cardio Workout Half Assed Rugby or GCWHAR. Rugby should be renamed Clueless Padless Almost American Football. And the NFL should call itself Big Business' Sometimes Free High Speed Collisions With Pads. Truth hurts. Especially when it interferes with slick,mass media marketing strategy.


The passion a soccer fan has for their FC can reach lethal heights. That's DEATH to you and me. Or wild rioting by soccer fans that causes many minor injuries. In the USA,only Kenny Chesney concerts are as equally as lame and dangerous as a normal worldly soccer match. Best to wear a cup and a NASCAR rated fire suit to your next soccer match or Chesney gig.

Soccer is popular because nervous mom's can feel secure knowing the worst soccer injury pales in comparison to a gruesome football injury. In impoverished,under educated countries,soccer is the main diversion for most kids growing up. All that a group of those kids need is a properly inflated ball and enough space to run to start a fun soccer game. In the USA,most kids just need a pocket on their pants to store their IPhone while their hands are busy looking for a credit card (moms) to buy a $5 coffee at Starbucks.Then catch a ride in dad's BMW SUV to the beautifully manicured PAL field for a soccer league game. Everybody has their own idea of fun. I have mine. You have yours. Glass The Tramp has his Fun Fun. Cool tune. Check it out:  


Copa America is being held for the first time in USA. On the Copa's Benji anniversary mark.ZZzZZzzzzz. Sticking with the cheap acronym angle,CA should be renamed America Soccer Series or ASS for short. Then maybe people besides the rowdy South American natives living in NJ would clog up Route 3 near Met Life Stadium during the Peru/Colombia battle for something other than drug export supremacy while playing on plastic grass. The camel races held the night after at the Meadowlands Racetrack near Met Life Stadium were probably more entertaining than the 0-0 snoozefest that Peru/Colombia put on.


I still give former baseballer Bake McBride the Best Ever Afro in Sports award. He just nips former soccerer Carlos Valderama for the honor. Good work men.


I played soccer from 3rd grade to 7th grade. Then I started playing football. I can honestly say that I'm glad I waited until I was 13 to take football related hits. My brain is still fully intact. No CTE that I know of. Thanks soccer [sic].

Forever your red card

KK

@kapn_krude

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