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Monday, October 30, 2017

The Krude Experience - Kombucha Tea


Kombucha Tea

Want to get a hipster all hot and bothered for your own amusement? Of course.Want to cure every known ailment on the planet with a magic elixir? Sure.Then float the big K word whenever you feel the urge to openly argue well being with somebody. Kombucha that is. Not Krude.


I began brewing Kombucha tea in 2004. I had a fresh SCOBY (Symbiotic Culture Of Bacteria and Yeast) sent to me and directions to make it correctly. Since I had time on my hands (injuries kept me home for 10 months back then).It seemed like a a perfect time to 'detox' my med filled body with a natural tea.

Kombucha tea is a tea that must ferment for a week before it becomes potable. All it takes to brew it is a 1 gallon glass jar,tea bags (I used green tea),sugar,apple cider vinegar,non purified water and the kombucha SCOBY. Easy as shit to make. But very difficult to perfect.  

Since it is a 'living' beverage,only wood utensils and glass jars can be used to brew it. Can't use metal spoons or plastic containers. Too many kombucha newbies are dipshits and use metal while making their batches. Wrong move. Wood and glass. Period.

Too say kombucha tea is a worldly wonder drink is not correct. It won't cure cancer or make your grey hair dark again. What it will do is make you shit more often and keep you from getting ill during seasonal airborne illness times. At least that what it did for me for the 5 years I brewed and drank it. It has a funky,earthy taste to it that is hard to describe. It isn't bad,just weird tasting.

So it's 2017. And I'm back to brewing Kombucha tea. I will drink roughly 6 ounces a day of the tea. That should be plenty. When I do the $ math on Kombucha,it costs me around $1 a week to make a gallon. Not bad for spending 20 minutes a week preparing a batch.


For all the rotgut booze and greasy chow I funnel into my body on a steady basis,having a healthy drink of Kombucha every day seems like a logical action. And I ain't no hipster. Thank the heavens for that.

So if you are in the mood to make a living,slightly alcoholic drink at home,Kombucha is the way to go. Otherwise,just stick to Dunkin Donuts coffee and Pop Tarts as your morning ritual. Either way,life is good.

Too Sweet!!

KK

@kapn_krude 

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