#Life: Sunday Morning Coming Down



I never listened to a Johnny Cash song until I was about thirty-two years old. I woke up from another night of debauchery, walked upstairs to the kitchen and my Dad was making his "world famous potato soup," as Cash belted out "Sunday Morning Coming Down," - my Dad's favorite Cash song, I would eventually learn.

Yesterday I made a batch of that same soup - though, it doesn't matter how hard I try, I'll never duplicate my Dad's pot of soup. I'm sure you understand that sentiment. It's crazy how connected to past meals we get when it's really not even about the food.

So tonight I'm sitting at the end of the table as I would normally have at my Dad's house, on the Decatur St. block off of 22nd St. and the beer is flooding out my blood and my mind is getting to that stage where reality and make believe trade punches like Rocky & Clubber Lang.

I've always felt that Lang was Rocky's biggest foe. Apollo Creed was the first and Ivan Drago was the most tumultuous - but it was Lang that created the bridge for Balboa from hokey punching bag who lucked into a win to the champion a city desired.

Why do we all feel so alone? 

It's because we never have a moment alone. I know that those two sentences don't seem to make sense but think about it. Say a word, any word, on repeat. Fork.

Fork.

Fork.

Keep saying it and the word starts to not make sense. 

Now, tomorrow, you'll wake and you'll fire up your social media machine and you'll jump back into the fray as you have every day for who fucking knows how long.

It all begins to mean nothing because it never breathes. It's just always there. Always pumping out thoughts and feelings and we never get a chance to stop and think. All I know is that we're so fucking angry about anything and everything when we have everything we've probably ever wanted.

Except maybe that past meal - the one you'll never find on doordash or uber eats.

Or something. I don't know.

I got potato soup waiting and Cash is telling me that the man comes around, and I feel like I have a few times; eating a bowl of soup as Sunday morning is coming down around me.

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