Bumming with Bobcat: Bringing you the best of the worst in cheap booze since 2014

Sunday, February 8, 2015

Bum Wine Of The Week - Cisco Berry - 2/8/15


While there is no new episode of the BWB Podcast coming your way this week, I decided to give you all a special treat to hold you over until next Sunday, 2/15/15 when we return LIVE with an all new podcast! The special treat that all you readers get to enjoy today is the first Bum Wine Of The Week installment for 2015! We are starting off things quick today and featuring everyone's favorite liquid crack, Cisco! This is not the first time that a flavor of Cisco has been named a BWOTW, as last summer Orange Pineapple Cisco had the esteemed honor as being named the first ever BWOTW! We have not named a BWOTW since last Halloween, so lets get right into it!

 Cisco Berry!
What exactly is Cisco Berry? That's a great question! Cisco Berry was the first flavor of Cisco Wine that I had the pleasure of trying about two years ago. From the first sip right out of the bottle, you know that you just made a bad choice. Not that any of the other flavors of Cisco are much better, at least you have some sort of idea of the type of taste you will be getting. Is Cisco Berry just a mixture of all types of berries? Cherries? Blackberries? Berry cough syrup? No one knows!


Cisco Berry comes in at 18% ALC/VOL and each 375 ML bottle contains a recommended 4 servings. I suggest that you take that recommendation seriously, as the next few days will be rough for you if you finish off that whole bottle yourself. The words "THIS IS NOT A WINE COOLER" are proudly displayed on the bottle as a warning for unsuspecting potential drinkers of this wine that do not know the side effects. Looking at the different bottles on display at your local liquor store, you might thinks this is something similar to a Boones Farm or Arbor Mist, but this is of a totally different animal.


The listed contents on the bottle are standard for a variety of different bum wines. Cisco Berry contains "citrus wine & grape wine with natural & artificial flavors & artificial colors". Not very surprising that this wine would be filled with a variety of artificial ingredients after tasting it. Does cough syrup count as artificial? Oh and also don't forget the sulfites!


Questions? Comments? Call the number! Don't bother going to the website, since you will find no evidence of Cisco Wine even being in existence there. Can you blame them for not wanting to promote this fine bum wine? Not really, but I would still like to see the expansion continue.

When I went to my local liquor store to pick up a few bottles of Cisco a couple weeks ago, I asked the guy behind the counter if he was going to be restocking and getting more variety of bottles any time soon. He told me "no one comes in to buy Cisco any more, it used to be a hot seller since it was cheap and did the job, but now people don't come into the store to buy it as much". Well I told him that I could see that was the story since he has had the same amount of bottles in stock since I first came into the store and bought my first bottle of Cisco there two years ago! Don't worry my good man, I will keep spreading the word and make Cisco a hot seller again!

For those of you that follow the bum wine calendar know that this is a fitting induction day for Cisco Berry since it is Cisco Sunday! If you are new to the site and are unfamiliar, we have: Cisco Sunday, MD 20/20 Monday, Night Train Tuesday, Wild Irish Rose Wednesday, Thunderbird Thursday, Forty Friday, and Saturday is usually a readers choice pick of their favorite beverage!

Do you want to end up passed out in a ditch at the end of the night? Then Cisco Berry is the wine for you! I cannot honestly recommend this wine to anyone unless you are buying it for a quick, cheap drunk and that's all. No one would ever want to buy this "wine" to actually sip and enjoy. You know what? That doesn't sound like such a bad idea after all! Cheers!

1 comment:

  1. Cisco Berry is my favorite also. It is really an amazing reading so far. Which wine cooler brand you like most? Thank you so much for this writing and keep it up!

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