The Krude Experience - 11/9/15

Unofficial Holidays

Krude doesn't really celebrate very many 'official' holidays. To me,a holiday is a day off from work. It is also a day when it is tough to find a Taco Bell that is open. I don't buy into the religious aspects of any holiday. Krude is just being Krude. Like Manny was just being Manny. Therefore,I feel compelled to exploit my thoughts on days of the year that should be considered an officially recognized 'holiday'.For adults.No religion required. An asbestos stomach is.

The Wednesday before Thanksgiving Thursday

Debatably the third biggest drinking day of the year. Just behind New Years Eve and St.Patricks day. Unless you work in the food service,retail,or toll collecting biz,you probably have Turkey day off from work. And a 4 day weekend. Perfect time for binge drinking and carousing with equally wasted women. Then a few days to recover. To Krude,that is cause to celebrate. Thanksgiving has the Lions,Cowboys,and whoever on tv for 12 hours straight. That's a cool yawn. But Thanksgiving is really a recovery day for the drinky pros. And free dinner at mom's.

Super Sunday

Super Bowl Sunday should be a national holiday. It is everything the USA truly stands for: Gambling,boozing,controlled violence,and prompt pizza delivery. Even if you hate the teams playing in the game,the prop bets you can wager make up for the team hate. Or you can just get loaded for the fuck of it and watch the tv commercials during the game. Often more entertaining than the game itself.

WrestleMania Sunday

The greatest spectacle on Earth. Vince McMahon,in a blow and roid fueled vision,created WM in 1985. And Krude must bow to Vinny Mac in honor. Scripted pseudo violence,performed by skilled showmen,matched with an over the top production set. Yes,the fix is in. But it was never so entertaining. Even at a $75 HD PPV buy in rate. Let's see Dana White create something as special with his promotion skills. Vince > Dana. No contest.

Lemmy's Birthday

Lemmy,frontman and ace bassist for Motorhead has a birthdate of 12/24/1945. That's Xmas eve to most. To the Krude's of the world,its Lemmy Day. This year Lemmy turns 70. Have a Jack n' Coke instead of eggnog. Sing Killed By Death instead of Jingle Bells. Play slot machines at your favorite casino or Indian reservation. And have a quality (large breasted) chick at your side. Lemmy Day. You read it here first.

So if somebody believes in the folly of the likes of Santa Claus,Easter Bunny or Punxsutawney Phil,then why not believe in WrestleMania or Lemmy? Most holidays require a sad sack icon and requisite chocolate options for kids. Kids. And commerce.That's the real reason behind 'official' holidays. It's time for adults to have our own days to celebrate. With a day off after. We deserve it.



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