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Thursday, October 2, 2014

The Lex Express: The Gallo Report Archives



The full Gallo Report archives are now online here at Bumming with Bobcat! Those of you that have been with us since the old Lex Express days have been waiting for these to finally resurface, and after the special best of edition that was posted last week, it is now time to give you all the total package! Will we ever see the return of The Gallo Report? Only time will tell....

The Gallo Report 8/13/02

Finally the Gallo Report has come back to the Lex Express 2! Fans I apologize for the recent absence of the report but the man behind this column were on a little vacation. There is much big news in the world of wrestling that needs to be caught up on, and you’re only going to hear about it here on the Gallo Report. It’s Luger Tuesday August 13, 2002, and the biggest update in the history of the website is taking place so here’s the newest installment of the Gallo Report.

I’m going to take a new approach to start off this week’s column and get some things off my chest about the WWE. I like to call this What Pisses Me Off!

1. Hulk Hogan’s theme music
2. Paul Heyman’s ponytail
3. Eddie Guerrero’s mullet
4. The damn Rock winning the title for the Undertaker at Vengeance after he went off making movies, in my opinion he should be jobbing for Essa Rios on Velocity.
5. Brock Lesnar twitching every 3 seconds.
6. Ric Flair’s Man Breasts
7. Hulk Hogan’s Feathers
8. Kurt Angle’s Bald Head
9. Stephanie McMahon- Smackdown GM
10. Hulk Hogan’s theme music
11. The Anti-Americans
12. D-Lo Brown not getting pushed up the card and wrestling Raven every week on Heat.
13. Hulk Hogan’s theme music
14. Rico’s freaking mutton chops
15. Yes, once again Hulk Hogan’s theme music, Hulk just go back to Real American and those feathers look ridiculous
That is what pisses me off!

· Do not let Triple H and the WWE fool you he was not the man that threw Shawn Michaels through the car window on Raw on July 29th. Triple H could have been an accomplice to the act, but he did not act alone there is a higher power Triple H is working for. The real man behind this devastating attack is none other than Shawn Michaels former Rocker partner Marty “What About Me” Janetty”. If you go back in time you can remember when Shawn Michaels threw Janetty through the Barber Shop window. It is awful funny how Shawn got thrown through a glass window. Coincidence? I think not. Marty will strike at Summerslam and help Triple H beat up HBK at their quote on quote “fight” and will rip Michaels down to his underwear and powerbomb him through a flaming table.

· In high school Chuck Palumbo was on the debate team.

· The NWO is finally dead in the world of wrestling. It seems Big Show, X-Pac, HBK, and Kevin Nash (injured) have all gone their separate ways but I think there is going to be a new poison injected in the WWE the (BWO) Blue World Order. The Blue Meanie has been out of the WWE for almost 3 years now, but my guess is by mid-fall he will be back with new recruits.

In Next week’s Gallo Report you have to look forward to these stories:

· Goldberg vs. Gillberg?
· Someone’s been causing trouble behind the scenes of WWE shows who is it?
· Where the hell is Jason Sensation?
· A Bushwhacker is returning, but which one?
· B. Brian Blair speaks out in a one-on-one interview.

The Gallo Report 7/4/02

Welcome fans to the new and improved Gallo Report here on the Lex Express 2. This site has been about a year in the making, and what better day to re-launch the best wrestling site of all-time than on our nation¡¦s birthday July 4th. Loyal fans of this site will remember the weekly Gallo Report from last year¡¦s site, but this year¡¦s column is much more uncut, uncensored, and will get all the information you the wrestling fan want to know that nobody else is telling you. So don¡¦t go on WWE.com and read the Ross Report and think your getting accurate information because Good Old JR lies in his reports the Gallo Report has nothing but 100 % accurate information given to me by people in the wrestling business. So without further ado I would like to unleash the newest Gallo Report here on the Lex Express 2!

· A source closest to me has given me information that Vince McMahon has met with none other than Bret The Hitman Hart to give him another shot at being a WWE superstar. The meeting didn't get out of hand at first, in fact Bret Hart was very courteous to Mr. McMahon's office. This was until Vince and Bret were close to signing a deal when Mr. McMahon told Hart his plans for his character. Mr. McMahon wanted Bret Hart to dress up like a big blind homosexual whale and run down the isle blindly at various times. Bret was furious when he heard this and said "You screwed me at the 97' Survivor Series against HBK, you made a mockery of me using a midget, you killed my character, and you killed my brother so now you want me to ruin my image more and dress up like some queer whale" I don't think so McMahon!Bret than spit a goober in Vince's hair for the second time and ruined many thousands of dollars of equipment. I think it is safe to say all talks between Bret and Mr. McMahon is off.

· This next story on the Gallo Report will seem rather shocking to you the wrestling fan because the WWE has lied to you to cover up something they didn't want you to know. WWE superstar Lita has allegedly been sidelined from wrestling due to a neck injury where we heard the whole phony story on WWE Confidential last week. Lita is not injured in fact she is suspended from the WWE indefinitely for the next month. The situation was one night backstage Lita couldn't take Paul Heyman's ponytail anymore so she attempted to chop it off. Lita had to be restrained by the likes of the Brooklyn Brawler and Gerald Brisco so that she didn't cut it completely off. This was worse than Bradshaw's attempt to cut off Michaels Hayes mullet.


· I have found this big-time news story from a source that has told me that Vader has been arrested. Yes, Leon White (Vader) was arrested Monday Night July 1, 2002 on suspicion of spitting and threatening officers with rocks, resisting arrest, drinking and driving, careless driving and leaving the Members of the Colorado State Patrol and Boulder County Sheriff's Office responded at 8:30 p.m. to Court and Whaley Drive regarding a sport utility vehicle that crashed into a bush. The suspect, who suffered a cut on the head, left the scene and drove a block away to his home, witnesses reported.
When contacted by authorities, the 6-foot 4-inch 375-pound White told them he was looking for bullfrogs and catfish in a pond and crashed while driving home, according to an arrest report.
Officers reported White seemed severely intoxicated and had to hold himself up on the door jam. White became belligerent with officers when asked about his level of intoxication and said: "I will and can kick all of your asses! Let's fight ...," according to the arrest report.
Two of the deputies got their dogs out for protection. White stared the animals down and said he would kill them, the report said.
At one point, White picked up two rocks the size of baseballs and clenched them in his fists, Trooper Scott Hinshaw said. He also is alleged to have spit toward the trooper, but missed.
Eventually, officers were able to calm White down and he was handcuffed without incident.

· At a recent WWE house show it was pandemonium as we had 5 different WWE Undisputed Champions in one night. Yes, fans the Undisputed Champion, the Undertaker walked into the show the champion and were set to defend the belt against The Rock. The Undertaker defeated the Rock by himself and as he was ready to leave ringside Vinnie Vegas approached ringside and challenged the Undertaker for the gold. The Undertaker accepted the challenge and the fight was on! Vinnie Vegas got a hold of the Undertaker's tights and got the 1-2-3 and was crowned the new Undisputed Champion! Vinnie Vegas was showing off the gold backstage when the Booty Man was back their and challenge him for the gold and Vegas accepted. It was a great match, but Vegas had the title for no more than 10 minutes when he lost it to the Booty Man. The house show crowd was shocked. All of a sudden Gillberg approached the ring and the crowd went nuts! Gillberg challenged the Booty Man to give him a title shot. They had a match and Gillberg won the title. Not so fast Gillberg, Lex Luger came and beat Gillberg 1-2-3 and he left the show with his hands raised and the gold around his waist where it belonged!

· Inside sources have told me that former WWE superstar Jeff Jarrett has been arrested for a computer hacking, we have no more information for you as of press time, but we will update you in the coming weeks.

Next Week's Big Stories on the Gallo Report
· What does the Undertaker smell like?
· What does Haku have stored in his Big Afro?
· Is Jake Roberts in trouble again? O you bet he is and will tell you his embarrassing story next week.
· More on Jarrett's computer hacking scandal
· El Matador exclusive
· This and much more join us here on the Gallo Report every week on the Lex Express 2!

The Gallo Report 7/23/01
Hello Galloaholics and welcome to a very special WWF/WCW-ECW Invasion edition of the Gallo Report. For those of you who seen the pay-per-view do not know some of the stuff that went on behind scenes of Invasion. We are here to tell you everything you didn¡¦t know about it!

· The Invasion pay-per-view last night had many shocking moments that will forever be remembered by pro wrestling fans. Last night we seen 11 match-ups, but the Gallo Report has news that there was really a 12th match signed to the card. The 12th match that was supposed to go down last night at Invasion was supposed to be a 2 on 1 between ECW¡¦s Sabu and WCW¡¦ Lodi vs. WWF¡¦s Linda McMahon in a flaming table, barbwire bat on a pole, steel cage of death match! The match sounded very good and the few people that did hear about it were excited to see the contest, but yet again the WWF had to screw the fans out of what they really wanted to see and cancelled the match 5 minutes between the Invasion pay-per-view went on the air. The match was cancelled due to time restrictions and some fear of Linda McMahon actually dying (literally). The match ideas haven¡¦t exactly been scrapped yet, you could see this dangerous match as early as the 7/23 edition of Raw is War or there will be a big feud between the two sides leading up to a big confrontation at August¡¦s Summerslam. We will keep you posted.

· Last Night at Invasion the Gallo Report has learned that the Road Dogg showed up backstage. You know you might be saying what is so bad about Road Dogg being backstage? The problem was Road Dogg was stoned while he was back there and he was shouting a bunch of stuff like he was there to claim his WWF Heavyweight title, and how he wanted to get in a fistfight with Jacqueline. Luckily old Vinnie Mac and WWF security were there to put a stop to the unfortunate incident right away! They rushed back stage and beat road Dogg to a bloody pulp. In this clip you can hear the sounds of head of WWF security Jim Dotson telling Road Dogg to get off the property, Vince yelling and screaming at Road Dogg, and even out of nowhere William Shatner gets involved!

· If you go to WWF.com and you see the results to Invasion they falsely tell you that Invasion ended after Shane, Stephanie, Paul Heyman and Stone Cold Steve Austin all chugged beers. I was there last night in Cleveland to witness the event as all the other fans left the arena this new regime was still celebrating in the ring as all of a sudden David Arquette came out of the crowd with a lead pipe and was accompanied to the ring by Mick Foley. Arquette took out every last member until it was just he and Booker T in the middle of the ring, Arquette then nailed Booker with a kick to the head and rammed him with the pipe and Foley counted the 3 and David Arquette won the WCW title! If you don¡¦t believe what went down just listen to this clip! As suddenly you will hear Bobby Heenan and Tony Schaivone (who is supposed to be in jail for killing Roddy Piper) do commentary.

· And shockingly again last night after his match and a loss to Kidman X-Pac went into the WWF bathroom and took a piss!

Well that¡¦s it for this week Galloaholics I hope you enjoyed this week¡¦s edition of the Gallo report, and next week you get to enjoy these topics.
· The official Jake Roberts interview- when I sat down 1-on-1 with Jake and asked him many questions like why does he do drugs and where¡¦s Damien?
· Where have the Stooges gone?
· Blue Meanie and Road Dogg?
· Where the hell is TL Hopper!
This and much, much more next week on the Gallo Report!
Remember there are a new Gallo Report and Winner of the week every Monday on the one and only thelexexpress.com.

The Gallo Report 7/16/01
We meet again Galloaholics! It is now time for a new weekly installment of the Gallo Report and I hope you all ready because it¡¦s going to be a big week. And with WWF/WCW Invasion just around the corner anything can happen in the world of pro wrestling. So let¡¦s get started once again!

· If you read last weeks Gallo Report you know that legendary pro wrestler Roddy Piper was shot and killed by a sniper up in a tree. For a week cops in the area tried to come to the bottom of this case, and they finally have their man! Thanks to a lead from Unsolved Mysteries Robert Stack. Stack was around the area when Piper was shot and killed and he knows exactly who did it! The man who shot Roddy Piper was none other then WCW former announce man Tony Schaivone. Tony Schavione held a grudge against piper for many years, and said he killed Piper because he said he was sick of seeing Piper wear that ridiculous skirt! They did record this when Tony Schavione was being carried away in police custody. You can hear the sound of rioting crowds in the background screaming at Schaivone as they throw beer bottles, hammers, hot dogs, pieces of metal, and rocks at the head of the man who killed their hero Roddy ¡§Rowdy¡¨ Piper. Then I sat down with the key eyewitness Robert Stack he had this to say about the shooting of Piper. We here at the Gallo Report hope Schaivone gets what he has coming to him!

· Now the next story is on a positive note. It seems that the two biggest drug addicts on the face of the earth have decided to call it quits. Jake Roberts and Darryl Strawberry have teamed up to launch a national ¡§Don¡¦t Do Drugs Campaign¡¨ to help younger kids know the understanding of how bad drugs are in their life. The Anti-drug campaign is going to go into full affect on October 15, 2001 if Jake and Darryl haven¡¦t overdosed yet (just kidding their clean now.) We talked to Darryl and Jake the other day and asked how the Anti-drug campaign would work. ¡§ We want to tell kids its wrong and being drug addicts ourselves we know how to tell them what¡¦s good and bad about dem¡¦ drugs and we know from experience and we wanna help get 3rd graders hooked on crack, whoops I mean we wanna help them not get hooked, my bad,¡¨ said Jake Roberts. ¡§It¡¦s a great opportunity for me and Sam hear to get together and help the kids¡¨, said Strawberry. Even though you have to question Darryl being cleaned up because he called Jake Roberts Sam. Anyway the motto of their campaign is ¡§Kids don¡¦t do drugs, look at us and we did them and look at us now!

· We at the Gallo Report have learned that the Undertaker¡¦s music will once again change. He will soon be involved in a new gimmick. Download the Undertaker¡¦s new theme that he will probably start using in mid-October here.

· And last but not least max Mini still smokes crack!!!!!!!!!!

In Next week¡¦s edition
We will tell you all the things you didn¡¦t know from the pay=per-view on Sunday when next week is a very special WWF/WCW Invasion edition of the Gallo report.
Remember to read the newest edition of the Gallo report every Monday on with a new weekly Winner at the one and only LexExpress.com.

The Gallo Report 7/9/01
Views expressed by gallo are not neccessarily those expressed by everyone else on this website.
Viewer Discresion Is Advised
Hello Galloaholics and welcome to an all-new Gallo Report update here on the one and only TheLexExpress.com. A lot of things happened in the world of pro wrestling since our meeting last week on July 4th when this site officially opened. I¡¦ve dug up many juicy things that I get straight from my sources so I can give to you the wrestling fan. And it tells you everything good Old¡¦ JR won¡¦t! This week¡¦s Gallo Report will include topics you¡¦ve never¡Kever heard of before. But sadly this week¡¦s edition will not include anything about the killer whale, or the peanut butter and jelly sandwich, or even former U.S. President Ronald Reagan, maybe another time. But enough of me saying worthless bullcrap lets get to it!

· At King of the Ring 99¡¦ you may remember in the Main event it was Stone Cold vs. Vince and Shane for rights to be C.E.O. or something like that. Well anyway it was a ladder match and whichever side got the briefcase with the papers inside it won the match. Well if you can remember the McMahon¡¦s won because some idiot pulled the briefcase up with a rope while Austin was going up to grab it. For year¡¦s people wondered who did it? And why? Well we at the Gallo Report know the man who was behind it was none other then George Costanza from Seinfeld!

· The next story shows a legend going up in smoke and the embarrassment this event I¡¦m about to tell you ruined his career and his life forever! Hillbilly Jim was at the top of his game in the late 80¡¦s to early 90¡¦s when he was one of the Federations top draws. But last week this all changed for Jim when a tipster led police to his house in Mudlick, Kentucky and found 5 pounds of crack in his living room. When police found the drug lord he was laying on his living room floor with a white substance foaming from the mouth. Apparently he was so stoned he was doing things so inappropriate to his dog we can¡¦t even tell you here on the Gallo Report, as he acted out like it was still 1990 and his dog was the One Man Gang.

· Next on a sadder note here at the The Lex Express.com we have got note that for the 8th straight summer we will not see a return run for Lex in the Lex Express. I know if you are reading this you are probably crying right now, but it¡¦s ok, we also have good news for you! In the year 2003 Lex himself will go on a 10th Anniversary run in the bus! This tour will be called the ¡§Lex Luger reality tour¡¨ and he will join Star Wars Mark Hamill and former WCW star Goldberg. Luger with his new pals will go cross-country in the bus for the second summer in 10 years and will tour all 48 Continental states (sorry Alaska and Hawaii.) The tour will be sponsored by Ruffles potato chips and their motto is ¡§Three Men, One Bus, One Adventure!¡¨ More news will be given as we receive word form Lex.

· One more update for this week, is apparent Jr. has taken some shots at this column because he¡¦s said, as I quote, ¡§ John Gallo is a menace to this business, and his column sucks!¡¨ I¡¦ve just got one thing to say to you ¡§ You¡¦ve got something to say to me say it to my face or else keep your trap shut!¡¨

That¡¦s it for this week Galloaholics¡¦ but this is what you get to look forward to for next week.
· We go inside with former WWF tag-team the Bushwhackers and find out why one had more teeth then the other.
· We find out the real deal behind the death of Yokozuna and let me tell you it and nothing to do with his weight problem.
· Bezerker!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
· And finally what ever happened to Mean Street Posse.
· This and much, much more right here next week on the Gallo Report right here on the one and only TheLexExpress.com
Remember fans the Gallo Report is updated every Monday along with ¡§the Winner of the Week¡¨ so remember to check them out!

The Gallo Report 7/4/01
Views expressed by gallo are not necessarily those expressed by everyone else on this website.
Viewer Discretion Is Advised
Hello Galloaholics this is the Gallo report and I¡¦m back after being in a coma for 6 straight weeks, but I¡¦m letting you know that I am all right and I¡¦m ready to give all the news to you the wrestling fans what the Ross Report won¡¦t tell you! It¡¦s been a look wait but finally you know what¡¦s coming! The new The Lex Express.com is where all the new Gallo Reports will be launched so check every Monday for a new weekly installment of the Gallo Report. I also have added a new segment to the Gallo Report I like to call ¡§Winner of the Week¡¨, this award is given to who I think was the biggest winner over the past week in wrestling on shows like Smackdown, Raw, Heat, and Metal. The wrestlers who win the winner of the week will not only be mentioned in the weeks column but I will do a nice bio on each individual telling why I think they deserved this award. Well that¡¦s all I have to say lets get to the newest Gallo Report entry.

· It¡¦s very shameful when a pro wrestler gets arrested, ex. (Grandmaster Sexy, Scott Hall, Road Dogg, and some other low-life scumbags) and they are making the business look bad! This is what happened to a wrestler you might know from early 90¡¦s WCW known as Abdullah ¡§The Butcher¡¨ a couple of years ago. You see Abby was in the ¡§I can count to five¡¨ Deli in Knoxville Tennessee on April 4, 1995, and he was in there to buy a bag of sour cream and onion chips. Then Abby snapped he tried to run out of the store with the chips, but when the owner ran after him to stop him the butcher ¡§butchered¡¨ the owner named Kip Hipp (interesting name I know). Then Abdullah was put on Death Row and was sentenced to the death penalty. On June 3, 2001 Abdullah the Butcher was put in the chair and got death for his crime.

· Remember Nailz? Sure you do the former prison that went after the Big Bossman claiming he beat him in his cell the guy who went on to be the infamous prisoner in WCW, one of only two men who ever hit Vince McMahon (not staged of course, other being Bret ¡§Shitman¡¨ Fart aka Bret Hart.) You heard this from the Gallo Report first but Nailz a.k.a Kevin Wascholz has started his own wrestling promotion and is planning to compete with the WWF and one of the men he hates Vince McMahon. This new promotion Nailz will start is called F@%# You Vince McMahon and its name says it all. Even though it appeared Nailz was wasted when I sat down with an interview with him he said and I quote ¡§My federation will be better because I¡¦m talented and Vince never gave me my rightful shot I deserved, plus I am planning on hiring such top wrestling talent as Road Dogg(see above topic), Greg Valentine, and maybe even Jake the Snake if he agrees.¡¨ ¡§These guys are legends,¡¨ he yelled in my face. ¡§Better then any other the curtainjerkers that McMahon has got that¡¦s for sure!¡¨ He ended our interview by passing out on the floor after laughing. The FYVM is scheduled to begin September 12, 2001 somewhere in Oklahoma so check local listings for channel and times.

· Its just a rumor but apparently we at the Gallo Report have gotten word that X-Pac took a piss at exactly 11:08 am yesterday morning. Yes I know that¡¦s the most shocking bit of news we¡¦ve ever told you on the Gallo Report, but we just had to let the secret out!

· We at the Gallo Report have just learned from our sources that the Main Event at Wrestlemania 18 is going to be Mike Tyson vs., Sylvester Stallone in a two out of three falls match for the WWF title. Now we heard the first fall will be a first in the WWF. The first fall will be a ¡§ Bite my ear match¡¨ and the winner will have to actually bite the other man¡¦s ear off to win the fall. The second fall in honor of Rocky will be a Philadelphia Cheese steak eating contest, and whoever can eat the most wins the fall. If the match isn¡¦t over by then the third fall will be the Hell in A Cell Match With Don King standing on top of the cage. This whole confrontation started when Tyson accused Stallone of being a girly man and said he wasn¡¦t a real fighter and Rocky was really a no good bum. Stallone took offense to Tyson¡¦s comments and challenged him to the match.

· I don¡¦t want to be the man to say this but we here at the Gallo Report have learned that WWF wrestler Roddy Piper is dead. He was shot and killed by a sniper a couple of weeks ago. An ongoing investigation still goes on as we try to find out who killed Roddy Piper?

Well that¡¦s all we have this week Galloaholics, but remember to tune in next week for the Gallo Report and find out about these topics:

- We go inside the mind of a clown when we find out how it really feels to be Doink the Clown.
- Much more on Lex Luger and will there be any plans for a return run in the Lex Express this summer?
- It is rumored that TL Hopper has been arrested find out next week here!
- This and much, much more!
So remember to tune into the one and only The Lex Express.com every Monday for a new weekly installment of the Gallo Report.
¡§May the Schwartz be with you¡¨

The Gallo Report 5/14/01
Views expressed by gallo are not necessarily those expressed by everyone else on this website.
Viewer Discretion Is Advised
At last the weekend is over and onto the Gallo Report for this week. There is much news on the show so lets get right to it!

· Just Joe ? Why did they sign the man? What was his use? Why did they get rid of him ? The Gallo Report has that answer for you! The bottom line is the reason the WWF had to release Just Joe was because Just Joe is dead, YES DEAD! At a recent Smackdown taping Mr. Fugi apparently showed up and out of nowhere Mr. Fugi "Shot the Messanger!" JUST JOE (2000-2000) R.I.P.

· The bottom line is there has been some big names at pay per views for refs and enforcers but in tis year's Summerslam will exceed anyone we've seen in the past. We've seen such names as Mike Tyson, Chuck Norris, Jesse Vebtura and more. This years mystery ref will most likely ref the title fight that will probably end up being a "Bad Gimmicks Only 4 corners match between Doink, Virgil, Repo Man, and Skinner. The special ref in this match at Summerslam will be none otther then Arnold Schwarzenegger!

· Remember Flash Funk? The Gallo Report sure does! The stupid goofy guy with the big ears and the big boots and the ridiculous dancing gimmick. Well if your wondering where Flash went the Gallo Report has a special report for you. Last week the so called Funk was arrested at a local Chuckie Cheese restaraunt. Now what Flash did was just out of line! He went to get "funky" in the ball pit and when the manager told him he's was too old, too big, too fat and that his wrestling gimmick sucked too much for him to be in that ball pit Flash refused to move he ignored the manager and just kept chanting his theme song at the gentleman. The proper authorities had to be brought in and Flash still didn't move. So the cops set in and sprayed Funk with pepper spray and finally got him out of there. The irony of it all was when Flash got back to his feet he began to chant I'm a star and how all the little kids at the restaraunt wanted his autograph, and then he tried to slap a 5 year olds hand until the kid yelled "hey Flash you suck!" and then he proceeded to stamp on Funk's foot.

· Now a lot you WWf fans who have been watching Wrestlemanias for years know that for the last 3 W-manias Pete Rose has been a fixture at the big show. Pete came, saw, and got his ass kicked for three straight years until this year when he obviously wasn't at the Astrodome for Wrestlemania X-seven. I bet you're wondering where the hell Pete was right? Well the Gallo Report has the answer for you, Pete Rose was invited but what happened Pete was actually locked in his bathroom for 47 hours and couldn't get out. Now how do I know this? I'm the man who let him out.

· The Pete Rose incident was just one of the many questions left unanswered after this years classic. Another one was who was the Gobbly Gooker in the gimmick battle royal? Well I was backstage at the Astrodome and right when the gooker unmasked himself backstage it was none other then the bird man himself Koko B. Ware. What the hell was Koko doing there? What did he want? Will he ever return to the WWF? Nobody knows!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well that concludes this weeks Gallo Report always remember tune in for a new edition very Monday and Friday only at www.dxantix.net. Look forward to this Friday's edition when we will look into these topics and more.
· The Gallo Report has a special interview with Vince Mcmahon and brings up the topics of XFL, Joe Cool, and the Bezerker.
· Where do XFL all stars like He Hate Me do with their lives now? I have A a special section devoted to this on Friday.
· Tyson- Stallone Main Event Wrestlemania 18?
· I have a big update on this years King of the Ring of who will where the Kings crown and it will be shocking.

The Gallo Report 5/11/01

Views expressed by gallo are not necessarily those expressed by everyone else on this website.
Viewer Discretion Is Advised
I know its been a long time since the Gallo Report was published but fear not it's back, and it's back for good! I know you fans of this column were very dissapointed that I was gone, but I was on business learning all I need to know so I can report all the up and coming wrestling news to you the fans. In 6 months there is a lot to tel all you fans of the Gallo Report. So I will begin right now for our newest Gallo Report that is about 6 months in the making!!!!!!!!!!!!!

· Now along the times of the Blue Blazer aka Owen Hart (God Bless His Soul) there was a blue blazer that was a black man that would come out from time in the blazer's outfit. Now for many years WWF fans speculated who it was, they asked was it former M.O.M member Mo, or maybe it was Koko B. Ware? Well Right here the Gallo Report has that answer for you the black Blue Blazer was in fact none other then the J-E-L-L-O man himself BILL COSBY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

· Now you maybe wondering where old Million Dollar Man has been I know I have! Well from the Gallo Report only you now know that Million Dollar Man Ted Dibiase now works at Walmart! Yes WalMart! I actually went to his counter the other day that to pay for a new shirt and there he was and I caught up with Ted and asked him the price of my shirt and this is what he said.

· Now all you fans of the current WWF know that Kaientai is now involved in a gimmick when there talking their not really talking its somebody elses voices. Well I bet you would like to see who it is! Well the Gallo Report has it for you straight and simple! The two voices and there are 2 are none other then our old pal jake roberts and WCW's very own Harley Race.I caught up recently with the two gentleman at a recent Smackdown taping.Here is what they told me.

Well that concludes this weeks Gallo Report boys and girls but tune in on Monday for the latest issue.
When you will hear about this.

· What is in Tiger Ali Singh's turban and what does he do it with it?
· Why does Marc Mero have a strange fascination with Cheese.
· Who really was this years Wrestlemania Gooker?
· And plus Why was Pete Rose not invited to this years Wrestlemania we have the scoop!
· This and more read the Gallo Report at www.dxantix.net every monday and friday!

Gallo Not Only Speaks His Mind But Gives You (fake) Rumors
Views expressed by gallo are not necessarily those expressed by everyone else on this website.
Viewer Discretion Is Advised

November 27, 2000
Hello welcome to another segment of Gallo speaks his mind today I'd like to touch on a topic of what my man Rikishi was talking about of why he help hit Austin. Allllllll those Hawaiian guys were always held back because their Hawaian. My first proposition is a man by the name of SUPERFLY JIMMY SNUKA who never got his shot at the belt and you wanna know where he is now rotting in a jail cell for life for shooting his ex wife. the end


November 17, 2000
- Gallo speaks his mind
  • Farooq Asad is gay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • Doink is not gay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • Trish is hot!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • Naked Mideon is not!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THANK YOU I"VE SPOKEN MY MIND
Gallos(fake)Rumors
I have many rumors for you the people.
  • I would like to start out by saying I'm not Giant Gonzales!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • Thank You!!!!!!!!!!
  • Now moving on there is a big rumor that The Rock wears pink underwear!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • Max Mini smokes reefer
  • Update- Kane Unmasked it is actually none other than Oprah Winfrey
  • Golga, Doink, and the texas tornado(who i might add is not dead) live in a Winnebago together...
  • Luckily in a local Denny's emt's rushed to the scene as max moon was choking on all star breakfast
  • Issac yankeem kill yourself!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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