Cisco Sunday

Today is part one of the five part series over the next five days highlighting the top 5 bum wines. We are going to kick off this party with one that will make some people want to drink gasoline rather than this fine beverage, that being Cisco, also known as "liquid crack".

Now I don't want to scare you fine consumers away on the first day of our series, but this has to be done. Cisco Sunday just flows off the tongue, doesn't it? Cisco comes in a variety of different flavors and all of them taste equally terrible. I have not tried every flavor that exists, but I have had a good amount of them.

From the first time I decided to try a bottle of Berry flavored Cisco just about a year ago I didn't know what I was getting into. 18% alcohol and a warning on the label stating "This is not a wine cooler.", that's when you know you are getting into some serious shit. Upon first taste you wonder why you hate your life so much and would want to consume a drink like this. Pass it around the room and give everyone a taste, why not?

Berry, Green Apple, Peach, Strawberry, it doesn't matter which one you find and decide to drink, they are all terrible. As you can see documented in these pictures, you never want to drink Cisco alone, and always make sure you have your favorite bum wine on hand to use as a chaser.

I have tried to find the perfect combination to make Cisco somewhat tolerable and have only been successful once so far. The combination of Orange Pineapple Cisco and Pineapple soda was found to be very delicious and a real crowd pleaser.

As I put the final touches on the first installment of this five part series, I just want to leave you people with a word of advice from our friends over at urban dictionary and their thoughts on Cisco:

The Kool aide from hell. This unearthly blend of burnt rubber, rubbing alcohol and possibly bum piss leads to hallucinations, mental retardation and lack of a home. Drinking a bottle leads to a 3 day hangover that the devil placed upon you himself. Also known as "liquid crack" this anitfreeze/cyanide concoction can also substitute for nail polish remover. If injected will cause tumors. Enjoy!

Scott: Why is Rhonda sleeping in a box under a bridge with no clothes?
Matt: oh she drank cisco wine last night
Until our next installment tomorrow, keep on Rockin' the Paradise! Thanks Styx!
(Currently listening to Come Sail Away: The Styx Anyhology)

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