The Krude Experience - Cold and Broke

Cold and Broke

This is the most dreaded time of year for Krude. Holidays, birthdays, foul weather, and overall malaise. There is no joy in all the holiday nonsense for Krude. And the extra cold weather makes it worse. But I wouldn't be Krude if I didn't have an alternative way to live for the next 6 weeks.

First of all,I don't really give two shits about holidays. There are only a few that really sink into my soul. So anybody that turns their usual type A personality into a unmanageable hyped up asshole during this time of year is off limits for Krude to even speak a word to you. Just trying to drive around Northeast NJ during this time of year (with the overhyped assholes) sucks a major turd. So Krude often spends weekends in Atlantic City playing craps and drinking solid hooch and largely staying off the road.

I do my obligatory holiday and birthday shopping using Amazon Prime. Even if you hate Bezos for any reason,it is the easiest way to shop. Fuck malls and department stores. 2 day shipping with Prime is the way to go. Waiting on any line anywhere is the shits. Live and learn all you Krude Experience readers.

Above anything it is my wallet that takes the heavy beating during this season. I have Holiday gifts AND 5 birthdays to buy. Plus the usual bills to pay. Thank goodness for early 2018 tax filing. I claim zero on my taxes and always have a nice vig shooting into bank account come mid to late January. So the cheapest booze and easiest pussy are my go to vices for six wintery weeks. No shame in that.

I try to stay in good shape (even in the July of my years). So I never over eat or drink too much during the winter holidays. This goes for New Years Eve as well. I usually just see a rock show during NYE and have a drink or two. It's more fun to watch the 'normal' people of the world lose their minds while watching a flashy ball drop live in Times Square on TV. Or just slip my cock into a chick at the exact stroke of midnight on NYE to welcome the New Year.

Pussy > Hooch. Always.

And then there are the applied efforts of trying to track down an endangered species during this harried season.No,not that elusive children's toy. To be exact,it was Night Train Express wine that I was trying to find. NTE is no longer being produced sobs... But Krude being Krude (and knowing of various ghetto honey holes) found the last 8 bottles of Night Train in my area. Santa Claus couldn't have given me a better gift. Cheers! 

Cold and Broke. Could be worse. Krude always looking for an alternative. To everything. Mahalo.

Lost in the sauce again


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