The Krude Experience - 2022 NFL Preview

 2022 NFL Preview

Greetings from the sordid yet sweet world of Krüde. I am back with my annual NFL preview blog. Professional football is always a fun thing to follow and worship. The players,owners and coaches often giving us much reason to ridicule them. My job here is to exploit the already exploited actions of said players and teams. Why the fuck not? I’m Kapn Krüde. And this is my blog. Word. Let’s do it!

Arizona Cardinals

Murray is an all world talent. Too bad he is the size of a jar of pickles. This team competes. And will break your gambling heart

Atlanta Falcons

Mariotaville now. Total trainwreck of an upcoming season. Hot ‘Lanta deserves better

Baltimore Ravens

Could be the class of their division. Or fools gold. Who really knows? Harbaugh on borrowed time with Jackson as QB

Buffalo Bills

I once claimed Josh Allen wasn’t a star. I’ll stand by my assessment. This team is above average,but not elite. Enough success to merit the new Enormodome they are getting

Carolina Panthers

New home Baker Mayfield. ‘Nuff said

Chicago Bears

Windy City blues. Buddy Guy should write a bluesy number about these chumps. Drink only hard liquor Bears fans. You’ll need it

Cincinnati Bengals

Boy,were we ALL wrong last year about this team. Burrow was pushed hard. Just enough to make Cincy interesting during primetime games for the next 12 years

Cleveland Browns

If all of Batman’s foes came together and played pro football,they would be called the Browns. Like WTF?

Dallas Cowboys

NFC East champs cuz the division sucks so much. Could be a surprise for gamblers. And a nightmare for fans. Jerry will send Brinks truck to Sean Payton’s house next February

Denver Broncos

Russell Wilson will wish Pete Carroll was his coach by week 4. Donkeys D went with Fangio. Take a very deep breath Denver. Long season

Detroit Lions

Motown needs a boost. Going for 4th down conversions all the time ain’t it. Same old same old….

Green Bay Packers

Doesn’t matter who Rodgers throws to. Pack makes playoffs. And loses in spectacular fashion

Houston Texans

Never has a team been blessed with so much talent in recent years. And managed to fuck it all up. Incompetence personified

Indianapolis Colts

Matt Ryan. Old man Matty getting in the saddle in Indy. Rivers,Wentz etc …. Doesn’t matter who is at QB. It ain’t Luck

Jacksonville Jaguars

This team will be a total spoiler this season. They will win games they shouldn’t. And lose games by a hair. Pederson will make a difference

Kansas City Chiefs

Mahomes has a ring. Reid has a ring. Win more than lose is the MO for this team. Is there any motivation left in these guys?

Las Vegas Raiders

My pick for AFC Super Bowl team. All the stars have alligned. Vegas needs a big winner. Goodell will give it to them

Los Angeles Chargers

Another good team that goes as far as their defense does. Winning shootouts doesn’t bode well for anybody. Herbert can’t win by himself

Los Angeles Rams

McVey made a champ out of loser ass Stafford. Repeat ain’t happening. Obviously

Miami Dolphins

Living on Tua time. Fish will compete enough. But not enough for glory

Minnesota Vikings

Rebuild time in Minny. Or maybe Cousins finally learns how to win. Either way a ways off from any post season action

New England Patriots

Mac the knife. Will cut you to size. It’s the Pats. They will win. How they win is always the bone of contention

New Orleans Saints

Dennis Allen is head coach. QB room is Jameis and Andy Dalton. This could get ugly very quickly.

New York Giants

Another year in the NJ swamp. Another year of sub prime football. Daniel Jones is a first round QB bust. Time to gut the team

New York Jets

Good HC. Not so good team. Cutie pie QB ain’t no Broadway Joe. Or Ken O’Brien. Or Mark Sanchez. Fireman Ed best save his vocal chords for better times

Philadelphia Eagles

Hurts must be all world for these birds to fly. Lurie likes to win more than make $. Should be fun to watch. And don’t challenge an Egales fan to a fight

Pittsburgh Steelers

Tomlin will somehow eek 8 or 9 wins out of this squad. He is that good a coach. Trubisky will get a pay raise cuz of HC Mike

San Francisco 49ers

Who will lead this team to the promised land? Trey Lance gotta grow up quick. Same old cast of characters (except Jimmy G). Gamblers beware

Seattle Seahawks

No lock with Lock. Geno ain’t it either. Carroll may quit after this debacle of a season

Tampa Bay Buccaneers

Tommy boy took a few weeks off to ‘clear his head’. He knows something. Always does. This team going nowhere

Tennessee Titans

A meat and potatoes team. Run first. Strong D. Like the Lombardi Packers,without the Hall of Famers.

Washington Commanders

Another name for this team. Same shit owner and stadium. Riverboat Ron will get results despite the nonsense. Just not enough

Pro football is upon us. 5 and a half months of good times. Bad times. And plenty of booze and greasy foods. Enjoy!

Win your parlays….

KK

T @kapn_krude

I @krude_kapn

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